How to Act on a Lunch Date

How to Act on a Lunch Date

by Sheba Simms

About Sheba Simms

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Sheba Simms has been writing and editing since 2001. She is a full-time freelance writer with a Master of Arts in English and publishing from Rosemont College. Although Sheba enjoys writing on virtually any topic, she is especially knowledgeable in real estate, marketing and Web site creation.

For busy professionals especially, lunch dating is a great way to find romance on a tight schedule. Meeting up at lunch also takes some of the romantic pressure out of dating because lunch occurs at a more casual time of day, doesn’t present the anxiety of a goodnight kiss and it is usually shorter than the typical dinner date. By following a few simple guidelines, you can make the most out of your lunch date.

Step 1

Be your true self. The purpose of dating is happiness and companionship. If you are not yourself, you’ll give a false impression. The right person will accept you for who you really are — flaws and all. On a more superficial level, a benefit of dating during lunch is that you and your date can physically see each other much better during the day. That is, disturbing or pleasant physical attributes that are normally disguised by candlelight or moonlight aren't as hard to see.

Step 2

Pay attention to nonverbal communication. According to psychologist Jeremy Nicholson of Psychology Today, your date might be somewhat reserved initially. These reservations might include: slower, careful speech, small gestures and leaning his or her body away from you. However, you can encourage trust by smiling warmly and behaving calmly in a nonthreatening manner. As your date becomes more comfortable, he will respond with more encouraging cues such as using more animated gestures, leaning toward you and speaking faster and with more enthusiasm. If you don’t get these cues over the course of your lunch date, this doesn’t necessarily mean you haven’t made a potential love connection. Your date could be nervous or mentally preoccupied.

Step 3

Choose your conversations wisely. Although your meeting occurs much earlier in the day, it is still a date. First impressions are important, so you should discuss topics that don’t kindle deep emotions. Past relationships, for example, are a poor topic to discuss on a date. Focus on your partner and display a genuine interest in getting to know her better. During your lunch date, it is socially acceptable to discuss lighter topics and not come across as being evasive. On the other hand, dating at night tends to be more intimate, and you might feel more pressure to have a deeper, more intrusive conversation.

Step 4

Decide on whether another date should take place. If you get asked out on a second lunch date, you can say no without feeling too badly. After all, lunch is during a rather short work break, and it might be easier to avoid or turn down the request because of it. Still, unless you experience red flags that make you uncomfortable, understand that it might take a few dates before you know whether or not you’ve got a love interest. Don’t feel as if you must make a decision after your first encounter. Likewise, if you or your date decide to move on, don’t lose heart. Studies show that dating is a numbers game. That is, the more quality dates you go on, the closer you’ll get to your happily ever after.

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