How to Begin Dating After Divorce

How to Begin Dating After Divorce

by eHow Contributor

Dating after the age of forty is not easy but it does not have to be painful. Perhaps you are coming out of a long-term marriage, or emerging from a period of time where you were consumed with raising children or caring for elderly parents. Maybe you are still responsible for children or parents and you aren't sure what the best way to get back in the game is. Finding love a second (or third!) time around is entirely possible. However, before you start scoping out the places to actually find Mr. or Ms. Wonderful, start with these tips on getting yourself into "dating shape". It's not easy to put yourself back out there, but with a positive attitude and some self-assurance, you are likely to find the love of your life. It does not happen over night. If you incorporate these ideas into your dating plan, you will have more confidence and that will shine through when you finally meet your match!

Take care of YOU. This is so important. So many women rush out to find companionship only to forget how important being happy with herself is. Bottom line, if you're not happy, your relationship will never flourish. Take time to enjoy the things you love, take care of yourself, enjoy your independence and find new interests. You never know who you'll find when you're out there learning new things. Whether you take up a new hobby, go back to school or get back to the gym, feeling good about yourself is an important step that you cannot miss.

Do NOT make a finding a date your biggest goal in life. It will never happen if all of your focus is on meeting the right person. You will burn out or turn off any potential suitor! The best way to find love is to not make it your life's work.

Do not make a wish list or limit yourself in the "who to date" department. You might think you will only date someone with dark hair or a person who has no children, but chances are the love of your life might come in a different package. Be open to something new. You will be surprised that the person you wouldn't take a second look at might just be perfect for you.

Be honest and never sacrifice what is important to you. A warm body is nice, but isn't what you need in the long run. If you get into a relationship and you have to wonder if your partner is feeling the same, more than likely he or she is not.

Do not commit just to have someone. Date. Learn about yourself. This time around, make it right for YOU. Most of all, be ready. That means don't rush out and try to find a "replacement". Spend enough time getting to know yourself before you let someone else get to know you.

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Photo Credits

  • Cheryl A Phillips, greatdate.com