About Christian Dating

About Christian Dating

by Denise Oliveri

About Denise Oliveri

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I am a homeschooling mom of eight years. I have three boys ages 10, 12, and 14. In addition to this, I am also responsible for a newsletter that goes out to over 120 families in my county for homeschooling families. I teach electives at a local co-op. I am also a Sunday School teacher of 14 years, and still going strong. I have taught children ages 2 to 12 in this time. My husband and I are responsible for editing a children's newsletter that goes out to over 200 families in our church. I am a freelance writer with Suite101 where I am the Parenting Tweens Feature Writer. I enjoy being around kids, especially my own, and I am very happy to write about articles that help parents and children in a number of areas.{{}}

Finding that right person is so important to anyone searching for their soulmate. It is especially difficult for Christian teens to find someone who will share their beliefs and encourage their faith. It seems that many teens just want to have fun and are not in a relationship for keeps, and Christian teens have a different set of standards. So what's up with Christian dating? Let's find out.

Significance

Christian dating is something that more and more people are talking about, teens in particular. From friendships to dating, teens understand that their faith should be very important, and instead of following the "norm" when it comes to dating, they are inflecting their faith into their relationships. The teen years, in particular, are tough for them because they are just starting to find their way and form relationships outside of the family. Dealing with issues such as sex and boundaries start to arise, and they find themselves having to deal with very adult issues. That is why finding a Christian partner is so important.

The Facts

Christian dating is not so different from non-Christian dating when it comes to the basics, such as feeling physically and emotionally compelled toward the opposite sex. But it is considerably more faith-based and, therefore, there are different rules to follow that Christians set for themselves. When taking a friendship beyond a certain level, there is a lot to consider. Knowing what you want and how you will resist temptation takes on a whole new meaning. Christian dating is based on building a productive relationship with God as well, so instead of just answering to yourself, your parents or the person you are dating, you are answering to Him as well.

Misconceptions

Christians in general have a different attitude toward dating, although even among Christians there are differences. Non-Christians see dating as something that is expected and a rite of passage, which brings them more maturity. Christian teens tend to see it as more of an honor and a way to build a life with someone once they are mature. Although certainly Christian teens date just as much as non-Christian teens, they tend to do so with less people and on a more serious level.

Benefits

It is known among most Christian teens that God has more in store for a them then just jumping from one relationship to another. Knowing what God expects of a Christian relationship offers a level of comfort when it comes to dating because two Christians should know these standards and try hard to adhere to them. These standards include not having sex until marriage and giving yourself to only one person for your entire life. Yet it is not about just following the "rules" of dating, but about living your life a certain way, which is so important when teens start dating.

Expert Insight

Since Christian teens know that God means for them to marry one person, and although life sometimes gets in the way of that, it is not rare for Christian dating to consist of only seeing one person during or after high school and then marrying that person when they are ready. It is also not uncommon for teens to refrain from dating at all until they are mature enough to follow God's rules for relationships and find that they are ready. Unlike non-Christians, more emphasis is also put on the friendships rather than just jumping into love. Finding the "right one" means something more than just finding a great date to the prom. It means finding the one that follows the beliefs that you have, and one that values you both as a person and as a Christian.

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