First dates are often romantic and exciting, but can be nerve-racking experiences for some. On your date, you'll likely want to have a good time and also make a good impression. What you actually do on your date really depends on both your likes and dislikes, where you live and who's doing the planning. Some people like to do a lot of planning, while others revel in spontaneity and surprises. A first date can range from a short and casual meeting to a night of fine dining and dancing. Whatever you do, you'll want to try to relax. Coming into a first date with too many expectations can leave you both disappointed, so just be yourself and keep things light.
A Good Time
You can definitely expect to spend time on your first date getting to know each other. Most people love to talk about themselves, so be ready to listen. You should also be ready to talk about yourself, preferably in a way that conveys that you're comfortable and happy being who you are. Your date may tell you things about herself that you consider to be your own personal deal-breakers, but at the same time, may keep you entertained and laughing. Allow yourself to go with the flow and let go of judgments.
Your date is likely going to be as nervous as you are, but like you, will try not to show it. Having a few laughs during the start of the date will help relieve your mutual nerves and let more of your true colors show during the date. Keep in mind that it's not unusual to make mistakes on the first date, such as saying something that you wish you hadn't mentioned, so try not to take everything too seriously. Take some slow, deep breaths if you begin to feel nervous or anxious.
Talking about a Second Date
Most first dates involve a meal, and often end with a kiss. Don't expect to determine if this person is Mr. Right just based on your first date experience, but don't exclude the possibility, either. Your date may discuss the possibility of a second date. If you are enjoying yourself, be open to the idea of another date and getting to know each other better. However, if your gut tells you that this isn't the one for you, or something about him just doesn't seem right, don't commit to a second date or lead him to believe that there will be more dates to com.
You should expect your date to show you respect during the time you spend together -- no matter what. If you feel that he's being patronizing or is using language that offends you, don't be afraid to let him know. If your date is making you uncomfortable enough that you want to cut your date short, don't be afraid to speak up. Simply excuse yourself and remove yourself from the situation. Always have a plan of escape, such as cab fare or a friend you can call, if you need to leave.
View Singles Near You
- The Dating Black Book; Carlos Xuma
- BananaStock/BananaStock/Getty Images