How to Fight For a Relationship

by Cathy Pelekakis

About Cathy Pelekakis

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Cathy Pelekakis has been writing professionally since 2006. She retired from the Department of the Army in 2007. Her professional experience includes work in writing, contracting and proofreading. She obtained a Bachelor of Arts in business from Thomas Edison State College.

You are in love and your partner has done something to hurt you. Your significant other may have strayed and was with someone else. Your significant other may act closer to his or her parents than to you. But you are in love and you are willing to forgive and you want your retaionship to work. Now what do you do?

Analyze shat you want

Take a step back and think real hard about what you want out of a relationship, what are you willing to give up, what actions you will accept and how much will you take before you finally have had enough? These are questions that you have to ask yourself. If there are children involved do you want to work on the relationship to save your marriage and family. Look long and hard at what is causing the problems and are there reasonable avenues that the two of you can take that will help to resolve the problems.

Understand what is happening in your relationship, has your significant other been ill, did he or she lose her job, not get a promotion, are the bills piling up faster then you can pay them. There may be outside factors that are working on both of you that is putting a strain on the relationship. If the strain is coming from financial problems, think about getting a part time job or doing some extra overtime at work to bring in more money to pay off some of your bills, work together on getting rid of the stressors in your life and your relationship will become stronger

Do not lay all the blame for problems at the feet of your significant othe. You are responsible for some of the problems. Try to understand what is going on and make steps towards working on a resolution

If your significant other has been caught cheating or straying, do you still want him or her back? Will they do it again? If you honestly feel that the relationship is worth keeping seek family counseling. And if your significant other is dedicated to rebuilding a relationship he or she will go with you to family counseling

If you feel that your husband or wife is still tied to their parents, remind them that they are adults, and they must understand that they are now married to you and that they can't go running to thier parents at every turn. If you have a decent relationship with your in-laws and they are nervous about being left alone, reassure them that you will be there to assist them and that you are happy to be a part of their family. Thank them for having their child so that you were the lucky one to wind up with him or her.

Work at your relationship, strive to survive the pitfalls that every couple has, do not be in such a hurry to blame someone, life happens and we all have to deal with the turmoils that surround us. Who knows your significant other may just be going through a midlife crisis where he or she does not feel adequate. They get a bit older and feel that they can not keep up with the way they used to run their lifes.

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Tip

  • Seek family counseling

Warning

  • Beaware that everything you do may not be enough, be prepared to lose.