No matter what age you and your partner are, there is one true rule of dating -- you cannot be perfect all the time. Trying to be flawless in any situation will tire you out, needlessly. Worse still, if you are not truthful about yourself in a relationship, your partner never gets to date the real you. So, even though your approach may change with age, honesty is always in style.
After almost ten turbulent teenage years, many people find themselves interested in their first adult relationship. Avoid pick up lines, because they come across as unoriginal. A genuine greeting works better. Also, avoid acting arrogant. Confidence is attractive, ego-mania is not. Once you have met someone who piques your interest, be direct about your intentions. That is not to say you should be demanding, just that the person should understand your intentions. If you are interested in spending just a night together, do not say you are looking for something long term.
People in their thirties usually have clearer goals and aspirations than their twenty-year-old counterparts. Many have finished college and have spent time in the workforce. Chances are good that they are not as interested in having a fling as a twenty-year-old dater. Once you have met someone and made the initial contact, take him or her to a quiet restaurant or coffee house. If you want to develop a serious relationship, you have to learn as much about the person as possible. Ask questions, and listen to the answers. Do not spend the time thinking about what you will say when your date stops talking. Also, avoid talking about past relationships. You have lived long enough to experience love, but you do not want to seem bitter or hung-up on the past.
The Washington Post reports that, while people in their 40s do not have as many choices as daters in their 20s, their maturity makes it easier to build a lasting relationship. Some 40-year-old daters are still unmarried, others are returning to dating after long-term relationships or marriages, but most are well-developed individuals who are interested in finding someone with whom to spend quality time. Focus on the importance of personality and finding someone who fits into your life as it stands. You may have kids, a house and some emotional bumps left over from your previous marriage. Do not bring out all your baggage in the first couple of dates. It is important, while still being honest, to have an air of mystery about you. That keeps your partner coming back for more.
50s and Beyond
Do not let anyone tell you that you are too old to find love. People in their 50s and 60s can, and do, find love everyday. It may be harder for older people to meet significant others their age with an interest in a romantic relationship, but there is no telling how old you will be when you meet "the one." If you are re-entering the dating scene after a long relationship or marriage, you might want to practice. Your social skills might be in top shape, but your flirting may need some work. Remember that physical contact still speaks volumes. Take time to hold your date's hand or link arms. Remember to stay positive. Negativity is a turn-off. Kane County Magazine says that you need to stay confident and, if necessary, plan topics of conversation ahead of time.
View Singles Near You
- Jupiterimages/Creatas/Getty Images