Whether you've been on three dates or 30, it's natural to want your guy to feel attached to you. Perhaps your boyfriend hasn't yet said "I love you," or maybe you haven't even kissed yet. Maybe it's your husband from whom you feel disconnected and want to feel like he truly desires you. No matter how long you've been with your guy, you can help spark his interest and desire in a way that makes him feel close and connected to you.
Be available for your partner when he feels distressed, advises Lisa Firestone, PhD, in "How Your Attachment Style Affects Your Relationship." Be a good listener and avoid giving advice. If you let him talk it out, he will probably come up with his own solutions. On the other hand, if he is the strong silent type, he may just need your physical presence. Let him know you're there for him, and if he wants to talk about what's bothering him, you're ready to listen.
Spend time together trying new things. Go water skiing, take a hike through a nearby forest, spend a weekend camping with friends, take a swing dancing class or cook dinner together. New activities allow you to spend time in new situations and keep your relationship constantly changing and growing.
Embrace your femininity. If you like to wear dresses and high heels, wear them. If you want to curl your hair and fix your makeup every day, do it. Perhaps femininity to you means cooking dinner every night or keeping your house tidy. Do those things that make you feel womanly and feminine. Don't try to hide, diminish or change your femininity in an attempt to make your man like you more. He likes you because you are naturally different from him and your femininity is a powerful tool.
Do your own thing. While you should spend time together as a couple, don't overpower your man with constant attention. If he wants to hang around the house, ask one of your girlfriends to go dancing or to see a movie. Maybe you want to spend the night at your mom's house or take a road trip to see a close relative. Do those things. Don't feel like you can never be apart or he'll feel less attached. Often, a little distance can help him miss you and want to be around you even more.
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- Go Get Guys: Emotionally Attach Him To You
- Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep from Dating Yourself!; Marie Forleo
- Psychology Today: How Your Attachment Style Affects Your Relationship; Lisa Firestone, PhD
- Fox News: 7 Traits that Make Men Really Attracted to a Woman; Laurel House
- Jupiterimages/Creatas/Getty Images