How to Know When to Start Dating After Divorce

by eHow Relationships & Family Editor

No one can tell you the right time to start dating again after you have been divorced. You will know it is time when your feelings of loneliness and rejection give way to enthusiasm, optimism and even curiosity. A healthy attitude about dating comes from regaining your confidence and feeling good about yourself.

Ensure that your divorce has been finalized before you take any active or obvious steps toward reintroducing yourself to the dating world. If you are actively dating while you are merely separated, your chances for gaining the upper hand during the final divorce settlement may be seriously compromised.

Start dating after your divorce as soon as you feel comfortable with the notion. Don't listen to family and friends who may be telling you that you need to get out and find someone new. You will only be able to find a suitable new romantic interest when you are able to get rid of all your baggage and start a new phase of your life.

Confirm that your personal life outside of the dating arena is stable and complete. You should not start dating after a divorce if your life is still in turmoil from the break-up of your marriage and you are still experiencing a lot of drama on a regular basis. Too much baggage will send most prospective dates running for the hills.

Know when to start dating after a divorce by seeing how you function alone in your life. Ask yourself if you still depend too much on others in your life for emotional support, or if you feel withdrawn and mistrusting of the world in general. You will need to develop a better sense of self-worth before you can hope to have a modicum of success in the dating world.

Find out how well you handle rejection after your divorce. The dating scene can be both cruel and impersonal, and if you find yourself feeling utterly devastated when someone doesn't return your calls, or ask to see you again, then you probably aren't ready to date again. Take a little more time to heal, and do something to improve your self-esteem, like buying a new wardrobe or joining a gym.

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Warning

  • Do not introduce your children to a new boyfriend or girlfriend unless you know that the relationship is stable and will last a while. If introduced too soon in the relationship, children may become attached to the new person, or they may be resentful .