How to Learn How to Flirt

How to Learn How to Flirt

by Contributor

About Contributor

author image

This article was created by a professional writer and edited by experienced copy editors, both qualified members of the Demand Media Studios community. All articles go through an editorial process that includes subject matter guidelines, plagiarism review, fact-checking, and other steps in an effort to provide reliable information.

Flirting is an art that can be fun and can eventually lead to a relationship. Both guys and girls can flirt, and there are basic' s about it that can be learned. Flirting is a skill that can be improved upon. This article shares some simple steps on how to flirt.

Items you will need

  • Practice
  • Patience
  • A smile
  • A wink
  • A phone number

Don't expect too much from flirting. You may be interesting in the person, but don't start poppin' in images of getting married already into your head. The reality is, most flirting is casual and doesn't result in anything. However, do know that flirting can open the door to further a relationship with that person.

Be casual. Relax. Smile. Look approachable.

Make eye contact with the person, but don't stare. Smile with your eyes.

Start a simple conversation with the person. Talk about what is going on around you at the time. Don't be negative in your conversation. Don't be too serious. Small talk usually leads to more conversation.

Listen to everything the other person is saying and respond appropriately.

As the conversation moves on, share a little more information about yourself. One suggestion is to ask what they do for work. Don't share too much information too quickly.

Here is the tricky part. If the conversation is going good, you can give hints as to your romantic intentions. You may try to touch their arm briefly. It is usually more appropriate for a girl to initiate a touch. However, guys can lead the girl, putting his hand gently on her back, to a seat, or another place to talk. Be cautious of any body language. If it makes the other person uncomfortable; stop.

After the conversation, ask for their phone number. Ask if you could call him or her sometime. You may want to ask for their email to gradually get to know them in a non-pressure situation. If it feels right, set up another time to meet.

View Singles Near You


  • Compliment the other person, but be sincere.
  • Have enough courage to ask for their phone number or email after a conversation.
  • Pay close attention to body language to make sure the other person is interested.
  • Start with small talk. Don't give out too much information too quickly.


  • Stop flirting immediately if you can tell the other person isn't interested.
  • It's usually not a good idea to flirt at work, a funeral, or any other inappropriate place.