How to Make Up for Being a Jerk

How to Make Up for Being a Jerk

by Crystal Green

About Crystal Green

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Crystal Green is a marketing and event management consultant specializing in non-profit organizations and small businesses. Green spent the last seven years working for a statewide education association directing their trade publications, writing articles for programs' training teams and other event-related freelance projects. Green hold a Bachelor's degree in Journalism, and is currently working on advanced degrees.

So you did something jerky and you need to fix it. Perhaps you forgot something really important or you said something completely inappropriate and now you need help getting out of hot water -- or the doghouse or whatever place your mate has put you in. From apologizing to buying something really nice, there are ways you can repair your state of despair.

Step 1

Admit that you were being a jerk. Fess up to your errors and take responsibility for your actions. One of the more aggravating traits of jerks is a disregard for other’s feelings or emotions in the situation. Start by admitting it, and then apologize for your attitude.

Step 2

Devise a plan to make things better. An apology alone is not enough to make up for your poor performance. Do something to smooth things over. Talk about why you said or did something wrong. If you’re clueless, ask your mate for clarification and understanding as well as a solution for how to best approach a similar situation in the future. Make a plan to change so issues like these don’t come back up in the future. Agree to keep the lines of communication open between you two so that, in case your behavior resurfaces, you can be aware of it immediately.

Step 3

Do something small to repair it. You don’t want to come off as if you’re going to charm your way back into your relationship. Start with something small, such as canceling one of your plans so you can spend time together, planning an unexpected date or buying a small token of your affection. Take it easy; you don’t want to make matters worse by substituting niceties for your errors.

Step 4

Ask for acceptance of your apology. If your partner forgives you, it’s time to move forward and put the issue in the past so you can continue with your relationship. Don’t dwell on the issue that happened, and ask the same from your partner if you two have agreed that things are in fact OK.

Step 5

Do something amazing to clear the air. Let your partner know ahead of time that, in an attempt to get back to a good place together, you want to do something great. Whether it’s going out of town for the weekend, planning a dream date of your mate’s choice or just spending a lot of quality time together rekindling your relationship, do something that will really showcase to both of you that you’re prepared to be on the road to making up.

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