How to Get Over a Breakup

by Relationships & Family Editor

Getting over a relationship is an experience most of us have to go through at some point in life. It's not easy all the time, but if you try to remain positive things will get back to normal and the wounds will heal eventually.

Allow yourself to grieve over the loss. Grieving includes going through feelings such as sadness, anger, shock and acceptance.

Take any pressure or expectations off yourself to get over it quickly. Depending on the length of the relationship or how important it was to you, you may need weeks, months or longer to get over it.

Take care of yourself. Get adequate rest, eat right and get some exercise.

Nurture yourself. Give yourself permission to relax, take it easy, and do whatever makes you feel better - such as taking walks, baths or naps; listening to music; reading; or watching movies.

Plan pleasurable activities with friends or family ahead of time (especially on weekends) to keep you busy and get your mind off the loss.

Consider joining a support group to be with others dealing with similar feelings. Ask your doctor for a referral.

Talk to your doctor about possibly taking medication if you're having trouble sleeping, or if you're experiencing anxiety or depression. Or discuss the options of herbal supplements such as St. John's wort (for depression) or kava kava (for anxiety).

Get a journal and write down what you have learned from the relationship about yourself, relationships and life. It's a great way to get things out of your head. Write down every every thought and emotion that runs through your head and use it as a venting tool.

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Tip

  • If the relationship was very significant for you, you may never get over it in the sense of having no residual feelings about it. Over time, the feelings will become less intense and you will be able to think about the relationship without it being so painful.