How to Recover From Infidelity & Survive a Breakup

How to Recover From Infidelity & Survive a Breakup

by Crystal Green

About Crystal Green

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Crystal Green is a marketing and event management consultant specializing in non-profit organizations and small businesses. Green spent the last seven years working for a statewide education association directing their trade publications, writing articles for programs' training teams and other event-related freelance projects. Green hold a Bachelor's degree in Journalism, and is currently working on advanced degrees.

Dealing with a breakup for any reason is a challenging process to trudge through. Regardless of who's at fault, you're both likely to go through a range of emotions as your feelings and lifestyles adjust. Ending a relationship where you've been cheated on will cause you to go through an entirely new set of feelings, causing you to doubt your self-worth at times. Surviving your breakup can be done with time and understanding.

Seek closure. If you've been cheated on, the obvious question you ask is why. Find out the details of what happened if you feel that you just cannot move on without knowing what happened. Have one final conversation with your former mate when you've both calmed down and can speak to each other civilly. Ask direct questions you need to know about your differences and what caused them to deceive you such as "How do you feel we grew apart?" or "What were the best things you enjoyed about our relationship and when did that change?"

Don't beat yourself up. Consider the issue as "spilled milk" and don't continue to get angry at yourself over the details and loss of your significant other. Immediately focus your energy and attention with moving forward and in exploring ways to get yourself back in a happy state. Allow yourself to experience all of the emotions and feelings your heart needs to heal itself, no matter if the feelings are good or bad.

Surround yourself with positivity. Fill time working on projects you prefer to concentrate on. Ask friends and family to be supportive by spending time doing things with you that are fun and upbeat. Mention to them that you don't want to be questioned about details regarding your relationship but rather on things that will help you move on such as upcoming activities and events planned, hobbies and just spending quality time together.

Try your best to move on. Get back out there and date. Open yourself up to meeting new people and realize that everyone is not meant to be together. Learn from the mistakes you may have made in your previous relationship but allow yourself a chance to find someone more suited for you who will treat you fairly. Take your time so that you don't rush into another relationship as a crutch, but do give yourself a chance to keep your heart available for someone who can appreciate what you have to offer.

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Tips

  • Should you decide to take your ex back, consider seeking a session with a relationship counselor to assist in the process of getting both of your feelings addressed. Consider spending time away from each other to sort through the emotions.
  • Give yourself time to heal and adjust to the changes accordingly before you jump back into another relationship. Decide how much time you need but consider giving it at least a month or two to get realigned to realizing what it's like not being with someone. Giving yourself that space will set you up for more success with your next partner.

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