The Signs of Confidence in Dating

The Signs of Confidence in Dating

by Stacey Elkins

About Stacey Elkins

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Stacey Elkins is a writer based in Chicago. She earned a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Southern Illinois University in Carbondale and a Masters in social work from the University of Illinois in Chicago, where she specialized in mental health.

Confidence is a quality that attracts others, says Leslie Sokol, a psychologist and author of "Stress Free Dating Equals Fun" on the Psychology Today website. Showing confidence can make you more successful when it comes to dating. From the way you look at your date to the way you talk to her, behavior that exude confidence can show that you feel comfortable with who you are.

Presenting Yourself

The way you present yourself is important. Maintaining eye contact can be a strong indication of self-confidence. Meeting someone's eyes, without maintaining a persistent stare, while talking can show confidence, says Christy Matta, a consultant in the field of Dialectical Behavior Therapy, in "10 Signs of a Confident Communicator" for Psych Central. Walking with a swagger and sitting and standing in an erect position also show confidence.

Exhibit Assertiveness

A sign of confidence in dating is the ability to show assertiveness. When a person is assertive, he is able to express his desires and needs to another person, as well as accept the desires and needs of that person, says psychologist Randy Patterson in the Psych Central article "5 Tips to Increase Your Assertiveness." For instance, an assertive person might verbalize that he is looking for a partner who shares his interests and values. An assertive person communicates directly and honestly in a way that advocates for himself, says psychotherapist Joyce Marter in the same Psych Central piece.

A Friendly Smile

A smile can go a long way in showing your confidence. Displaying a big smile makes other people feel comfortable and shows that you are confident in yourself, says Joyce Marter in the Psych Central post "Confidence is an Important Determinant of Success: How to Boost Yours." Smiling from across the room or when approaching a potential date will exude confidence. A friendly smile can also make you come across as more approachable.

Talk With Your Hands

A person's hands are often used as a means to communicate and can shed light on what that person is thinking, says Joe Navarro, a former FBI Counterintelligence Agent and author of "Body Language of the Hands" on the Psychology Today website. Pay attention to your hands and what they are doing, as certain movements of the hands can portray confidence. For instance, placing your fingertips together like a church steeple shows confidence and is often used to get a point across, says Narvarro. When a person feels confident, her thumbs will frequently rise as she talks, particularly if her hands are clasped together in front of her, says Navarro.

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