How to Start Dating Again

by Contributor

One of the hardest things to deal with after a break-up is figuring out how to start over. Trying to determine how long to wait and how to re-enter the dating world can be difficult. It is important to give oneself enough time to heal but also to try new relationships. Here are some suggestions for starting to date again.

Take it slow. Even if you are the one who initiated the recent break-up and feel that it was the right thing to do, your emotions may be sensitive and trusting or opening up to new people could be difficult. Give yourself a little time after the break-up to collect yourself and be okay with being single again.

Leave the past where it is. It is unfair to you and to anyone you choose to start dating to let your past relationships affect your current one. Understand that you cannot change what has happened and hanging on to negative memories of the past is not healthy. In order to successfully start dating again, you must be willing to let go of any anger or guilt about past relationships and look towards the future.

Try something new. If you have a habit of dating people who look similar or treat you a certain way, reintroducing yourself to the dating world can be a great opportunity to try dating someone different. Be open to dating someone who isn't necessarily your usual "type." It is a great way to meet people and discover new traits in your own personality.

Go public. A great way to start meeting new people again without putting a lot of pressure on yourself is to simply get out into the public and mingle with other single people. Visit your favorite bar or club for a drink or to hear a band or consider going to a "singles" event that introduces you to other single people without forcing you to engage in a one-on-one date.

Know what you want. If you feel that you are ready to start dating again, consider what qualities and priorities you are looking for in another person. You owe it to yourself to know what you want and require in a relationship, and being aware of these needs will make your dating decisions more informed.

Be yourself. Take stock of all your positive attributes and be proud of all the good things you have to offer another person, but don't be someone you're not. Be honest about who you are and what you want out of a relationship. If you were hurt in a past relationship be straightforward about it, but don't dwell on it. Being honest and upfront about yourself will make the dating process more relaxed for everyone.

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