How to avoid dating a player

When dating, it may seem like every person you run into is a player. The truth however is that these are just the most visible people on the dating market. If you are looking for a sincere person who is really looking for a relationship as opposed to someone looking to conquest, follow these tips on how to avoid dating a player.

Step 1

Stop dating. If you have a habit of attracting people who are players, it is in your best interest to stop dating. At the very least, take a break from dating and perhaps a class on self-esteem. Players tend to prey on women who do not exude a strong sense of self-esteem. Take yourself off the dating market until you are able to present yourself in a strong manner.

Step 2

Slow them down. When you do decide to date again, you need to slow down anyone who is looking to move quickly. Players are interested in getting what they want as quickly as possible. Lay some ground rules for yourself letting time limitations for different stages of a relationship. When you do this, you will be able to recognise a player, as they will become anxious and impatient.

Step 3

Start looking at people who are less aggressive about seeking you out. Players will approach you faster than more sincere people who will be more likely to observe you for a while to make sure you are someone they want to invest their time in. Seek out these people first. Of course, there are players who realise this and try to be coy, so take your time and analyse these people as well.

Step 4

Look for inconsistencies. Players tend to stretch the truth. If you truly listen to what they say, over time you will notice inconsistencies. This is another reason you want to wait as long as possible before getting serious as it takes time to pick up player like personalities.

Step 5

Avoid people who are obsessed with themselves. If you are interested in someone who is more focused on how they look (i.e. stuck on themselves) they it is possible that you are dealing with a player. A player is good looking and knows it. They tend to think they are entitled to treat others poorly because of this “fact.”

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Things You Will Need

  • self control


  • Take new relationships slowly

About the Author

Andrea Hermitt is an artist and writer who loves to research and write about new things. She's been a content writer since 2000, contributing to, the blog Notes From A Homeschooling Mom and other online publications. Hermitt has a Bachelor of Arts in fine art and English from the State University of New York at Albany.

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