How to Get Better at Talking to Girls

For some men, talking to women just doesn't come naturally.For some men, talking to women just doesn't come naturally.

For some men, the mere thought of talking to women fills them with dread. If your palms start to sweat, you start to shake and you start looking for the nearest exit when you think about going up and talking to a girl, there is no question that you need to improve your confidence. Confidence is everything when it comes to talking to women. If you build your confidence and overcome the basic fears that hold men back in this situation, you'll probably find yourself comfortable and at ease around women in the near future.

Step 1

Ask yourself what it is you don't like about yourself. Identify what you perceive to be your weaknesses and start working to overcome them. You won't be confident approaching a girl until you are confident about yourself.

Step 2

Convince yourself you are going to be successful before you go up and talk to a woman. Define success as simply having a good conversation. Don't put extra pressure on yourself by hoping for more, and don't ever convince yourself that failure is inevitable before you begin.

Step 3

Dress well at all times. People often feel more confident when dressed well. Take someone shopping with you to help you pick out clothes if this is a skill you feel you lack.

Step 4

Make a conscious decision to go up and talk to a woman. Force yourself to go and say hello to a girl no matter how scared you are. The more often you do it, the less painful it will seem.

Step 5

Listen carefully to everything the girl says. Respond to things she says and make the conversation more about her than about you. Don't talk too much. Ask her questions instead of just talking nonstop.

Step 6

Make eye-contact with the girl you talk to and keep your body relaxed. Don't be afraid to smile at her, and concentrate on being relaxed, casual and focused on the conversation. Don't try to put on a persona or force jokes, or you risk coming off as cheesy.

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  • Accept that rejection is part of the game when it comes to approaching and talking to women. Rejection doesn't hurt. Men with low confidence often convince themselves they are going to be damaged or lose self-worth if a woman isn't interested, but this isn't true. A rejection just means you didn't click with that particular woman, but the next one you talk to might find you irresistible.

About the Author

Hans Fredrick has been busy in the online writing world since 2005. He has written on diverse topics ranging from career advice for actors to tips for motorcycle maintenance. He holds a Bachelor of Fine Arts from the University of Saskatchewan.

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