How to Communicate Feelings When Attracted to Someone

Overcome your fear of rejection and communicate your feelings.Overcome your fear of rejection and communicate your feelings.

You have had feelings for the object of your affection for a while, but you aren't sure if the feelings are returned. You dream of the day when you can be together, but you just can’t seem to get over your fear of rejection and don't know how to proceed. But sometimes, all you need is to muster up a little confidence and communicate your feelings directly.

Step 1

Ask him to spend time alone with you. If he disagrees, he is probably not interested in having more than a superficial relationship at this time. Back off and give him space. If he agrees, he’s either interested in a closer friendship or may be interested in you romantically. Flirt with him, such as telling him that he is your perfect physical type, and see if he reciprocates.

Step 2

Express your feelings through your body language. Look her in the eyes when talking, smile and see if she reciprocates. If she turns away from you, scans the room while you are talking or crosses her arms, she’s probably not interested in you at that moment.

Step 3

Use touch, selectively. If you are getting good signals from the flirting and his body language suggests he may be interested in you, reach out and touch his hands while you are talking or press your hand against the small of his back while you are walking. If he does not pull away, he is interested in you. If he pulls away, do not show that you are embarrassed; after all you took a risk and sometimes these do not pan out.

Step 4

Ask her a hypothetical question and see how she responds. You can say something like: “If we were together, how would you have handled that?” If she responds by discussing how she handled the situation with an ex-boyfriend or her current boyfriend, she does not see you two together as a couple.

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About the Author

Brenda Scottsdale is a licensed psychologist, a six sigma master black belt and a certified aerobics instructor. She has been writing professionally for more than 15 years in scientific journals, including the "Journal of Criminal Justice and Behavior" and various websites.

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