Take the control away.
Do not allow them to see that you care. Sometimes the controller lies to gain control flow of a relationship. They may take a truth and stretch it to fit their abusive needs. They may tell you that someone said something that they did say, but by switching the sound up they change a whole lot more than a word. If you do not show them that you care they may have less to control.
Take them out of the equation.
If by any means you can step around the controller, then do it. This action may send them over the edge, because they may feel like they are losing control of the abusive relationship. For your own peace of mind, avoid the ones that suck the life out of you using control flow. It can be exhausting dealing with control freak characteristics on a daily basis.
Agree with them.
If you try to argue with them they may go off the deep end, spitting out words of thunder so fast that they might just knock you off of your feet. The control freak usually hates to be challenged in an abusive relationship. Good usually does not comes from challenging the controller.
Do not give them arms.
Tell them little about you and your life to avoid giving them control. Because the controller may like to manipulate the facts of the relationship you do not want to give them facts.
Never ask a control freak for a favor for you just may be selling your soul at the same time.
It can be risky business when a controller feels like they have done something for you that needs compensated. You may not want a control freak to have that kind of power over the relationship. It may be dangerous for both of your emotional health.
If they need to be the shinning star, step back and let them burn their face.
Many times when someone is attempting to steal thunder, grace, or control, in an abusive relationship karma may come a long and slap them back down to size. This may take some time, but karma usually does it's job.
If the control freak starts clinging to you then pull out the red flags, because this is likely a red flag situation.
Fasten your seatbelt and follow the steps above for you may not want them to invade your privacy or the control flow over the relationship. Stand firm and restore your control.
Finally do not allow them to get you down.
Remember that what goes around usually comes around. For every action there is likely an equal and opposite reaction, so mind your business and karma may make the controller mind their business.