Dating Tips & Flirting

Flirting is natural human behavior.Flirting is natural human behavior.

Dating and flirting are essential to human survival. People initiate contact with each other and express interest in one another that ultimately might lead to reproduction, which is vital for continued existence. Anthropologists find evidence of some type of flirting, dating or mating rituals throughout the world. As with most human behavior, there are rules to follow when dating and flirting.


There are two types of flirting: flirting for fun and flirting with intent. Flirting for fun is just that — fun. Flirting with intent is the first stage in mate selection and shows interest in the opposite sex. Eye contact is an important part of flirting. Making and maintaining eye contact for a second or two with another person shows interest. However, if the other person does not reciprocate the gaze, she is probably not interested. When engaging in conversation, make eye contact but be careful not to stare; look into their eyes briefly, and then look away.

Body Language

When meeting someone new, 55 percent of a person's first impression is based on appearance and body language. Body language includes facial expressions, posture, hand gestures and personal distance. When a male is interested in a female, he typically stands up straighter, puffs out his chest and might put his hands in his pockets to appear bigger. Females usually arch their back and cross and uncross their legs. Entering someone’s personal zone, about two steps away, is a non-verbal sign of interest, as is touching an arm or shoulder.


When people feel a strong attraction toward each other and begin dating, it is easy to want to spend every minute together. However, it is best to take things slow and see if you really like the person. Space out phone calls, texts and emails to every couple of days. Absence might make the heart grow fonder, and it allows for personal time. Keep past relationships in the past. Make the other person feel good, so do things you both enjoy, engage in conversation and have fun. Above all, be honest. The truth always comes out in the end anyway.

The Art of Conversation

Fifty-five percent of first impressions are based on appearance and body language, 38 percent are based on speaking style and the other 7 percent is based upon what is said. Therefore, how a person speaks conveys much meaning. People tend to speak slower, with a deeper pitch and more inflection, especially at the end of a sentence when interested. They also take turns speaking and are careful not to interrupt. Women are generally more skilled in light conversation than men are; however, both genders tend to ask more questions and listen while maintaining eye contact when they like the other person.

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About the Author

Michelle Strockbine covers health, wellness, education and business for various online publications. She has a Bachelor of Science in health and physical education from the University of Southern Indiana, as well as a Master of Science in human resource development from Indiana State University. Strockbine is currently pursuing a Ph.D. in instructional design from Capella University.

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