Explore your feelings independently. Before you approach your partner, you need to decide how you feel. Give yourself five minutes to write about your relationship, jotting down any details that pop into your mind. After these five minutes pass, review what you wrote and spend some time thinking about how healthy your current relationship seems to be, as well as how the relationship makes you feel.
Tell your partner what you need. After engaging in your metacognitive study of your relationship, sit down with your partner and express your needs. It is quite possible that your partner simply doesn't realize that she isn't reciprocating love and, if you tell her this, she will be more overtly romantic, giving you the attention you require
Explain why you need these things. Present some "I" statements, or sentences starting with I and dealing with your feelings, to your partner, telling him why you require that your love be reciprocated. Tell him for example, "I don't feel secure in our relationship when you don't tell me that you love me," or, "I struggle with low self-esteem, and when you don't show me you care it makes my struggles even worse."
Create a relationship contract. On a sheet of paper, jot down the things you promise to do for each other. For example, you might write that you promise to rub his back several times a week while he promises to give you a kiss and a hug as soon as he returns home from work. Sign this informal agreement and place it in a safe place.
Seek counseling if things don't improve. If your relationship remains one-sided despite your serious efforts, counseling may be necessary. Ask your partner to attend couples' counseling with you to mend and strengthen your relationship.