How to Be Flirty With Someone You Haven't Talked To

Flirting with a stranger can be easy.Flirting with a stranger can be easy.

Most people have been in the awkward situation of being interested in a total stranger at some point. Whether you are enthralled by someone across a crowded nightclub or someone you routinely walk by at your local park, the thought of flirting with a stranger can be rather daunting, but also exciting at the same time. Part of the excitement -- and stress -- is that if you don't act immediately, you may never get the chance again.

Stand out. Being the center of attention is an effective way to get noticed by someone you've never shared a conversation with. Stand in the middle of the room and be the life of the party. When it comes to wooing a stranger, it is important to get in his line of vision and make sure that he notices you.

Maintain an open demeanor. Make yourself approachable and not intimidating. A stranger might be scared off by someone who is sporting a "closed" body demeanor. Keep your posture relaxed and straight, and do not keep your arms crossed (arms crossed says "stay away" to people). Send a message that you welcome conversation. Do not come across as aloof or snotty.

Smile. A bright smile is a valuable asset, so it is important to make sure that you show it off. Flash your smile to the object of your interest, and combine it with sincere and meaningful eye contact for around 3 and 5 seconds (any longer and you might seem a little bizarre). Look him directly in the eye and make it obvious that you are directly communicating with him -- not the guy he's standing next to.

Send body-language signals. Body language is a risk-free and exciting way to subtly indicate flirtatious intent to someone. If you're attracted to a man you do not know, mimic his body movements, which is known as "mirroring." Synchronize yourself with him by copying his gestures and facial expressions, whether he's leaning to the side or raising his eyebrows. Apart from mirroring, it also can be effective to give off other flirtatious body-language signals of interest, such as angling your feet toward him when you stand.

Break the silence. The silence has to end eventually and you are going to have to speak with this special someone if you want the flirtation to advance at all. Stay away from generic and corny "pick-up lines." Pick-up lines are an easy way to get you dismissed forever. Pay attention to your opening sentence by being natural and not coming across as sleazy or weird. Consider commenting on a situation that is going on such as, "Wow, it's seriously crowded in here tonight, isn't it?" Or compliment something about her like, "That's a really great jacket! You have the best sense of style in the room." Say something that can help get the conversation moving. Show your confidence and try to have some fun.

Show interest in the stranger. Ask her questions about herself. Make her feel special, from asking her where she is from to what she does for a living. You don't want to come across as overbearing though, so stay away from any potentially intrusive questions.

View Singles Near You

Click Here


  • When flirting with a stranger, it can help if you surround yourself by friends, if you can. Try to avoid looking creepy (for instance, don't stare at someone all night from a dark corner), and make yourself as approachable and friendly as possible.

About the Author

Lars Tramilton has been writing professionally since 2007. His work has appeared in a variety of online publications, including CareerWorkstation. Tramilton received a bachelor's degree with a focus on elementary education from Kean University.

Cite this Article A tool to create a citation to reference this article Cite this Article