Don’t sweep your past problems under the rug. Talk to your partner about the problems that caused the break up. Avoid raising your voice and pointing fingers. Instead, focus on what you did wrong and the ways in which you could have better handled the situation. Apologize when necessary. If the tension still seems high, wait awhile to bring up the subject rather than forcing it on your partner.
Reminisce about the past. Talk about how you and your partner first met and what your first dates were like. Your goal is to once more stimulate those initial feelings of falling in love. This will also give you a break from the seriousness that accompanies the recovery process. If possible, return to a dating spot you frequented when you were still a couple. For example, go back to the restaurant you went to on your first date or watch the same movie you saw on your first trip to the theater.
Avoid becoming clingy during the process of making up. This will only put pressure on the situation and possibly cause your partner to feel guilty. To avoid overanxiety, remember to take time to focus on yourself. Just because you’re trying to rekindle a romance doesn’t mean you need to obsess over it. Hang out with other friends and participate in your favorite hobbies. If the relationship does fail, at least you’ll have other friends and projects to fall back on.
After you have both decided that you want to save the relationship, prepare to make compromises to avoid the same conflict issues in the future. For example, if cheating was the issue, promise to limit contact with others outside the relationship. If a lack of respect was the problem, promise to hold each other in higher esteem.