How to Get Over a Bad Breakup When You Still Like Him

Staying home feeling sad is not the way to get over him.Staying home feeling sad is not the way to get over him.

Many male-female relationships do not last long term. When the breakup is mutual, the couple may remain friends after they both move on to new relationships. More often, however, one person in the relationship loves less than the other, and initiates the end of the relationship, leaving the other person feeling betrayed and angry. If the relationship ends because one of the persons has found someone new and cheated on his/her partner, the breakup will be even more acrimonious. Although it is difficult, there are things you can do to help yourself get over a bad breakup.

Give yourself time to get over the breakup. Do not expect to feel perfectly OK right away. Allow yourself to feel sad for a few days before you begin to move on with your life. Mourn the loss of what might have been, but do not allow yourself more than half a week of wallowing in misery.

Do not keep replaying in your head conversations you had with your ex. Do not allow yourself to revise unpleasant scenarios in your head about how things might have turned out better if only you had said or done something differently.

Decide that you are going to get over this rough patch in your life. Telling yourself that you are determined to get over him will actually help you to do so more quickly. Do not allow yourself to believe that he was the one and only "Mr. Right" or that you will never be able to fall in love again. Positive thinking will help you get over the breakup faster. Do not allow negative thoughts to dominate.

Get out of the house and go places. Immersing yourself in the social scene will take your mind off your misery as well as increase your chances of meeting someone new. Keep an open mind when you do go out. Put a smile on your face and be determined to enjoy yourself. People who are happy and positive attract others.

Remind yourself that you control your feelings. If you believe you are over him, you will get over him. If you believe you will soon meet someone better, you increase your chances of having that happen.

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About the Author

Freddie Silver started writing newsletters for the Toronto District School Board in 1997. Her areas of expertise include staff management and professional development. She holds a master's degree in psychology from the University of Toronto and is currently pursuing her PhD at the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education, focusing on emotions and professional relationships.

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