How to Get Over a Breakup for Women

Breakups often seem like the end of the world to women. No matter how problematic a relationship was, it can still be devastating and hurtful to see a relationship end permanently. However, it is important not to wallow around and allow yourself to throw a nonstop pity party after a breakup. Allow yourself the freedom to get over your ex and to move on with your life.

Breakups can be a time to revitalize yourself.Breakups can be a time to revitalize yourself.

Step 1

Vent for a little while. Allow yourself a brief period of time to just put all of your emotions out there. Scream, cry, punch a punching bag and do whatever it is that you have to do to feel sorry and sad for yourself. Give yourself a cap on this, however, whether it is 3 hours or 3 days.

Step 2

Organize your life. Breakups are transitional periods in life. Take this breakup as an opportunity to clean out and organize your life, from your home and vehicle to your cubicle at work. Oftentimes, cleaning things can be therapeutic and help people to feel cleansed on the inside, too.

Step 3

Put away reminders of your relationship. Avoid getting caught up in the nostalgia of your relationship. After all, the relationship is in the past tense for a reason. Do not allow yourself to get misty-eyed while looking at pictures of you with your boyfriend in happier times, ticket stubs from trips to theme parks and gushy love letters. Either throw them away, shred them up or store them deep in the back of a closet until you're emotionally ready to face them again.

Step 4

Join a gym or engage in some other form of physical exercise. Exercise is not only an effective way to get physically fit and healthier, but it also can help you to deal with emotional stress that comes from a breakup. It can even help you to get rid of any extra pounds from post-breakup pity binging. Working out can also help you feel rejuvenated about life. Consider joining a local fitness center or even just jogging or power walking around your nearest park.

Step 5

Connect with your friends. Friends are useful for emotional support during breakups. Use your breakup as a chance to enjoy your friendships and to get out into the world. Some of your friends may have also experienced a recent breakup and you can be there for each other.

Step 6

Avoid rebounding. Do not try to get into a new relationship to dull any pain that you might be feeling. This is no foundation in which to begin a new and healthy relationship, and it also isn't fair to the new person. If you haven't dealt with your breakup yet, you are in no condition to be starting something new.

Step 7

Participate in some new activities. Apart from self reflection, breakups are time to be daring. Consider partaking in activities that you have always wanted to do, but never had the time for, whether it's painting, dance lessons, tennis or meditation.

Step 8

Stop communicating with your ex. This is not to say that in the future, when both of you have recovered, you cannot speak again. But during the healing period, it is best to refrain from communication. Take his name out of your cell phone so you are not compelled to text message him during a time of weakness. Get rid of his old email messages. Make a clean break until you are emotionally prepared to face him again.


  • Stay positive during a breakup. Always remember that the end of something signifies the beginning of a new something.

About the Author

Lars Tramilton has been writing professionally since 2007. His work has appeared in a variety of online publications, including CareerWorkstation. Tramilton received a bachelor's degree with a focus on elementary education from Kean University.

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