Physical Flirting Tips

Proper eye contact is an effective part of flirting.Proper eye contact is an effective part of flirting.

Flirting is a method for initiating contact, and expressing an interest toward people we are attracted to. Often flirting takes the form of verbal expressions of interest, such as traditional pickup lines. However, physical expressions often reveal more about the true intentions of two people than the spoken word. Learning to "read" these physical expressions can lead to greater success in achieving your desired results.

Make Eye Contact

Initiate effective eye contact with the other person. Our eyes send messages that reveal our thoughts, feelings and possible actions. In public, according to The Social Issues Research Center (SIRC), people are reluctant to make eye contact. And, if eye contact is made, it rarely lasts one second, states the SIRC. Consequently, when flirting in public, eye contact should be brief. When you spot a target that captures your interest, attempt to establish eye contact for a full second. If the person returns the eye contact for a second, without looking away, it could be a sign of interest. If the target makes eye contact for a second, looks away, and makes eye contact again, it could indicate that they are approachable.


Smile effectively to communicate your intentions. According to Susan Rabin, M.A, from, smiling is the first step in communication, and the best way to make a good first impression. Different smiles convey different messages, so practice your smiles in front of friends and ask them to interpret the message you are trying to convey. While flirting, a smile can be very effective while making eye contact. The key is to make both the eye contact and the smile brief. Take a genuine interest in the other person, and make your smiles sincere. If necessary, smile in front of a mirror until the smiles become natural.

Assume An Effective Posture

Use body language and posture that portrays confidence and acceptance. When sitting, leaning forward toward the other person conveys interest. Avoid crossing your arms and legs, as that may indicate that you are keeping the other person away. According to SIRC, females are more likely to tilt their heads to one side if they are interested in a person. When standing, assuming an erect posture with your shoulders back and your arms unfolded, conveys confidence. Never slouch, or lean against a wall, as it sends a message that you could be bored.

Communicate with Touch

Touch the other person appropriately during a conversation. Touching another person is an effective means of communicating a desire to become closer. The touch must be subtle, and care must be taken to not offend the other person. A light touch on the arm or shoulder, or picking a piece of lint off clothing, can convey a message of interest. Avoid touching the face, particularly as you are getting to know the person, as it may be construed as being too forward.

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About the Author

Based out of Houston, Texas, Michael Hutchins is a personal trainer who has been writing health and fitness-related articles since 1995. His articles have been featured in "Houston Health & Fitness Magazine." Hutchins has a Bachelor of Arts in speech arts from Hofstra University, Hempstead, N.Y.

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