Reasons Guys Give Up the Girl of Their Dreams

You never know when your relationship's days might be numbered.You never know when your relationship's days might be numbered.

It's a familiar situation to many young women: You start dating a man; things are going great; he tells you that he loves you and that you are the girl of his dreams -- and he sounds sincere when he says it. Then, seemingly out of nowhere -- BAM! He's gone and you're single again. Sometimes guys dump girls they love without being clear about their reasoning.

He's Scared

The number one reason a guy dumps the girl of his dreams is that he is afraid of settling down, afraid of a life change, afraid for reasons he may not even be able to enumerate if asked. Men are funny creatures. Often, they are as sensitive as women, but it is ingrained into many of them from a young age that their place in the social order is as the breadwinner, the soldier, the general tough guy. For some men, it is much easier to live up to that role without any kind of feelings messing everything up for him.

He's Not Ready to Commit

Whereas many women decide to settle down when they meet the right guy, most men operate on a timeline. They decide to settle down when an appropriate woman comes along at the right time. You might be the girl of his dreams, but if he hasn't quite decided to settle down yet, he might pass you by because you didn't come along at the appropriate time.

He's Fixated on the Worst-Case Scenario

There's a sexist old axiom about being able to tell whether a woman will get fat by looking at her mother. While this is a somewhat vile little "fact" that men bandy about in locker rooms and other all-male spaces, many men, intentionally or otherwise, take it seriously. If he gets the germ of doubt into his head, he will concentrate on the worst things about you -- your mother, your hometown and so on -- and ruminate on how you might only get worse.

He Wants to Play the Field

Related to their desire for the right time for commitment over the right person, many men are terrified of giving up their right to "play the field" or date many women. They may subscribe to the "grass is always greener on the other side" scenario, or they may simply be ladies' men. Sometimes, there is just nothing you can do about any of it.

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About the Author

Jennifer Gigantino has been writing professionally since 2009. Her work has been published in various venues ranging from the literary magazine "Kill Author" to the rehabilitation website Soberplace. She holds a Bachelor of Arts in film and digital media from the University of California at Santa Cruz.

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