What are the Signs of Dating a Loser?

Losers can be deceptive.Losers can be deceptive.

Losers are not always greasy-haired, broke slackers. They come in suits, positions of power and nice cars. On the first few dates, it may not be obvious, but there are many clear signs that you may be dating a loser as the relationship progresses. Dating a loser is not only bad for you; it's also bad for the loser, as it may reinforce his loser qualities.


A loser will frequently focus too much on finances. This clear warning sign can go both ways: either she constantly talks or mentions how much money she has or she never has any money. An obsession with making and counting money or a complete inability to acquire it are classic signs of loser thinking.


Losers constantly make excuses for their behavior. Nothing is ever a loser's fault. If the person you are dating constantly excuses his actions or attempts to shift blame to others, there is a good chance he is a loser. Losers frequently have low self-esteem and try to always be right, even when they are wrong. Eventually, he will start blaming you for things that are clearly his fault.

Mood Swings

While everyone is allowed ups and downs, losers can change tones on a dime, shifting from caring to angry, from happy to sad in a matter of moments. Losers will quickly change their tones and backtrack to get their way or save face. Be wary if she constantly shifts moods and goes from one extreme to the other: she may be insecure, immature and a loser.


Losers frequently think they are the most important people in the room at all times. An increasing need for attention, reinforcement or validation are signs of a loser. If he constantly seeks compliments or doles out insults left and right, he is probably a loser. Avoid dating people who can't see anybody but themselves, because they certainly won't see you.

Relationships with Others

Listen to your friends and family when they give you their opinions on your new partner. What they think of the new person in your life is often much more honest and objective than your thoughts, since you are biased in many ways. If she doesn't get along well with any of your friends and constantly avoids spending time with anyone you like, she is probably a loser.

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About the Author

Ricky Andromeda has been writing since 1999. His articles have been published on various websites, specializing in pool, art, hunting, antiques, home improvement, chemistry and gambling. He holds a Bachelor of Arts in English from Louisiana State University and is pursuing a Master of Fine Arts in writing at the University of Arkansas.

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