How to Stop Relationship Anxiety

Relationship anxiety can lead to an inability to embrace healthy intimate relationshipsRelationship anxiety can lead to an inability to embrace healthy intimate relationships

Relationship anxiety is an irrational fear experienced by many. The rejection, disapproval and uncertainty of relationships can be scary for everyone. For individuals who are susceptible to relationship anxiety, the fear of relationships becomes all consuming. Victims of relationship anxiety often suffer from an inability to sleep or function at work due to the overwhelming stress of their relationships. Sadly, relationship anxiety can lead to an inability to embrace healthy intimate relationships. Practicing specific stress management techniques can help control and prevent relationship anxiety.

Use daily affirmations to reinforce positive ideas.

Step 1

Think positive. Practice daily affirmations that will put you in a happy and secure state of mind. Try something like, “I am at peace” or “I am happy and contented in my life.”

Put your energy into accomplishing feats of fitness.

Step 2

Focus your anxious energy toward constructive activities like work projects, exercising or hobbies. Staying busy and focused will prevent your from falling prey to your overactive worries.

Volunteering to help others can put things into perspective.

Step 3

Volunteer your time to the less fortunate. Working for a nonprofit organization or with the homeless or underprivileged will help you to put your fears into perspective and channel your energy away from your preoccupation with yourself.

Keep track of things you are happy about and grateful for.

Step 4

Keep a gratitude journal and write in it daily. When you find yourself succumbing to feelings of doubt, go back to your journal and refocus your thoughts positively.

Relax. We can't control everything that our partner does.

Step 5

Avoid the temptation to over analyze your relationship. We ultimately do not have control over every nuance of our partner's life, thoughts or motivations. There is nothing we can do to fully protect ourselves from getting hurt.

Take responsibility for your anxiety.

Step 6

Take responsibility for your anxiety. Relationship anxiety stems from personal fears of emotional abandonment or fear of intimacy. Explore the nature of your fears and own up to them.

Emotional distance is painful for both partners.

Step 7

Recognize that it can be equally hurtful to emotionally crowd your partner or emotionally distance yourself from your partner. A balanced relationship is a partnership of two self sustaining individuals who are both present and available for one another.

Learn to enjoy your own company.

Step 8

Learn how to feel safe with yourself and make an effort to enjoy your own company. Respecting and embracing yourself is the first step toward knowing how to healthfully respect and embrace another person.

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About the Author

Tina Lane is a freelance writer and blogger in the Cincinnati and Dayton area. Her work has been published in the Eastsider Magazine, The Voice of the Miami Valley, and various online media. She blogs at, where she has been writing for two years. Tina is a Rollins College Alumni.

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